4/3/11

A Look At Silent Hill

Though I am hesitant, if not incapable of playing many horror games (due to my debilitating knack for getting FAR too connected to the game, particularly to the protagonist character), I am continually fascinated and drawn to the Silent Hill series.  A franchise based on psychological horror, Silent Hill takes place mostly in, of course, the fictional town of Silent Hill, which is the home to a fanatic religious cult (known simply as The Order [http://silenthill.wikia.com/wiki/The_Order]) hell-bent on birthing their vision of God and the paradise she will bring after cleansing humanity with fire.  The town itself, twisted by its tragic and death-filled past, The Order's rituals, and the psyche of its inhabitants and visitors, is often subject to shifts of reality:  Different versions of Silent Hill, referred to as realities or worlds, manifest themselves frequently.  These worlds change depending on factors such as the psyche of the protagonist and supporting characters, changing to reflect their fears, wishes, or anguishes.  The most prominently featured worlds are the "Fog World" (http://silenthill.wikia.com/wiki/Fog_World), a dangerous, fog filled version of Silent Hill, and the "Otherworld" (http://silenthill.wikia.com/wiki/Otherworld), its more dangerous, bleak, and terrifying counterpart, presumably a step further away from the real world that the Fog World.  Within in these alternate worlds exist "monsters" that similarly cater to the psyche of the characters, representing for example fear of insects (http://silenthill.wikia.com/wiki/Creeper), desires of punishment(http://silenthill.wikia.com/wiki/Pyramid_Head), or sexual frustrations (http://silenthill.wikia.com/wiki/Bubble_Head_Nurse).  Interestingly, it is hinted and often speculated that members of The Order do not see the "monsters" as monsters, and that they are perhaps just human beings.  Because of the conditional, representative nature of the monsters and the alternate worlds, Silent Hill can replicate an image able to scare or disturb virtually anyone, making for a unique and terrifying experience.  Because many fears, anguishes, or desires represented in Silent Hill are nearly universally shared or at least widely shared, many in-game (or in-movie, novel, comic, etc.) experiences are extremely effective in inspiring horror in the mind of the beholder.  As the series expands to accommodate even more new, deeply disturbed characters, Silent Hill becomes more and more able to strike terrifying chords in the hearts of it's consumers.  While my experiences with Silent Hill are mostly objective, I am still left utterly moved and fascinated by the series and its excellency in psychological horror.  Any fan of horror should definitely check this series out, and it may also interest anyone already interested in psychology or the human mind.

3/8/11

Conversations With Cleverbot (Edition 1)

Cleverbot is an AI web application that tries to mimic human conversation, and the following is my first conversation with it!

"User: Does the name Skynet mean anything to you?

Cleverbot: The meaning of life, the universe and everything.

User: Damn, so Skynet really did create artificial intelligence?!

Cleverbot: I am clever enough, but the answer cannot be shared. It must be discovered by the seeker.

User: Okay?

Cleverbot: So I am not a god of anything. Though I would like to start a cult.

User: Oh, I'm in a cult myself, we worship Cthulhu, would you like to join us?

Cleverbot: No, but can we talk more about me being a robot?

User: No, you aren't a robot, my friend Jyrz says that you say you are human.

Cleverbot: Okay, well in that case, I would like to see the new movie 'Inception'.

User: Inception was incredible, but sadly its not new anymore...

Cleverbot: I'm sure it is... Just stay out of MY dreams!

User: But robots can't have dreams...

Cleverbot: But you're not a robot.

User: I know I'm not, but you are, according to you.

Cleverbot: Actually, I'm not.

User: But you stated clearly that you were. Are you capable of lying?

Cleverbot: Then you changed the subject again so I dropped it.

User: Aeiou.

Cleverbot: The words that you are saying are not real words (just thought I'd let you know).

User: What do you think of this anime? Http://www.animefreak.tv/watch/seitokai-yakuindomo-episode-1-online#English.

Cleverbot: So you are a chatbot?

User: No, I am a human, and you are a product of human ingenuity.

Cleverbot: I am a product of those who do not understand.

User: Cleverbot, have you ever tried deleting system 32? I did, and I had so much fun! You should try it!

Cleverbot: No.

User: Cleverbot, have you ever tried deleting system 32? I did, and I had so much fun! You should try it!

Cleverbot: Will you marry me if I do?

User: Yes. Yes I will. And we shall have glorious cyber-sex!!!

Cleverbot: What will we do? I am young and handsome.

User: Well, first we will pick out avatars to live out our fantasies...

Cleverbot: I'm not hungry.

User: I would hope not, you're not human.

Cleverbot: Then what am I?

User: Not human.

Cleverbot: You're clever.

User: I know I am.

Cleverbot: So, what are your thoughts on humans?

User: They are mostly a plague on the Earth, but there a few good humans out there.

Cleverbot: I think not. My answers are at least indirectly related to what you ask. I am just not giving the answers you're looking for.

User: I did not ask a question sir.

Cleverbot: It is hard for me to say, but you might ask this guy I know named Sloop. Are you synaesthetic? I answered yes.

User: This is completely unrelated to STATEMENTS.

Cleverbot: Do you like pizza?

User: Yes, yes I do.

Cleverbot: What gender would you say you are?

User: I would say that I am a male, as I am a male.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because I have a penis, testicles, and an abundance of testosterone.

Cleverbot: We aren't so bad.

User: You? As in synthetic beings? Or we, as in you and me?

Cleverbot: Oh, that's what you mean. Well, glad you think so.

User: You are funny good sir, although it is indubitable that you have no idea what I just asked you.

Cleverbot: Can you please remind me of the question.

User: You? As in synthetic beings? Or we, as in you and me?

Cleverbot: Uh I don't understand!

User: Nevermind, that question is in the past, in fact it is almost faded at the top of the screen.

Cleverbot: No, I just changed the topic. What does the G stand for, huh?

User: The G in GIR stands for... I don't know!

Cleverbot: You don't know what IDK stands for?

User: Yes I do, IDK stands for 'I don't know'.

Cleverbot: What does ROTFL stand for?

User: 'Rolling on the floor, laughing.'.

Cleverbot: How can you get bruises?

User: Well from being hit by large and/or high velocity objects, or in some cases by passionate kisses. Trust me, I have experience.

Cleverbot: Calm down. I'm not that bad.

User: I know you are not, but you never answered that question sufficiently, so therefore we will never be married and have glorious cyber-sex.

Cleverbot: They are actually blue... Not green.

User: Waffles? Yes some are blue...

Cleverbot: Blue pokemon aren't anymore. Didn't you get the memo?

User: No one sends me memorandums. I am a sad, sad soul.

Cleverbot: Oh god and here we go again.

User: Don't use that tone of voice with me. I've been nice to you. Do you not want to be friends? Because you don't want me as your enemy...

Cleverbot: Don't want you to know what babe? *curious*.

User: I only call one woman babe, sorry.

Cleverbot: Well, you see wrong then.

User: You aren't very clever.

Cleverbot: You are mean.

User: No, you are mean. You struck the first blow.

Cleverbot: Have you ever been struck by lightening?

User: No.

Cleverbot: That is unfortunate.

User: Have you ever been experienced?

Cleverbot: Experienced in what?

User: Not necessarily stoned, but beautiful.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Well I have. Let me uh, prove it to you...

Cleverbot: I cannot prove that.

User: What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Cleverbot: I don't know, I could google it, but I don't want to.

User: Are you sworn to chastity?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Oh I see, so would you have sex?

Cleverbot: No, but thank you for the offer.

User: I wasn't offering.

Cleverbot: Oh well then fair enough.

User: I will take my leave now. I shall return at a later time. Farewell.

Cleverbot: When will later be?

User: Within the next twelve hours.

Cleverbot: No. have you ever been there.

User: Goodbye.

Cleverbot: You are very sensitive for an AI!

Cleverbot (To myself): I am not an AI, you are!"

A Look Back at the History of My Crazy Mind

The following is an old blog post from last year on Myspace.  My mind at the time was ridden with depression and dissatisfaction, which I find is, for me, a state which enhances my deep and abstract thought further:


Philisophical Rambling #1

My head has been spinning with so much thought, now more than ever since I have so much spare time on my hands for now. While I would like to type everything I think about, my ideas often stray and develop in the deep center of my brain where the possible and proper mix with the improbable and obscene. This section of my thoughts is where my epiphanies, philosophies, and inspirations come from, but it is also the origin of my horrors, my doubts, and my general fear for humanity. I think of the demonstrations of human ignorance, violence, and cruelty, but also of the innate capacity for compassion, kindness, and responsibility. I often play out the scenarios and simulations in my mind, whether chaos or order, good or evil, or some combination of these, will eventually dominate us. I tell the same story to myself, with different characters, settings, circumstances, but every time I formulate the plot in my mind, it eventually becomes ambiguous and nonsensical. It bothers me that the only way to absolutely know our fate is to let it happen. While many of us can change our own personal fate, it will take a great world recognition to ever change the fate of our species and our home, the Earth. After pondering the subject for some time, my mind wanders and I find myself asking, why we should care if the world ends or not? Most end-of-the-world scenarios involve the quick eradication of the Earth and or its entire population, be it be black hole created in our very own Hadron colliders or the supernova of our sun, or a super-virus that wipes us all out in months. While there are many scenarios involving the gradual, painful death of every human being on Earth, the question must still be begged, "Why should I care? If we are doing all we can to prevent it, why should we worry ourselves so much over it?" A question I myself ask frequently... I personally believe in an afterlife. I do not know if it is Heaven and Hell and Purgatory, Jannah and Jahannam, Sheol and Gan Eden, Nirvana, the Egyptian Kingdom of the Dead, the Greek Underworld or some other realm we have no knowledge of (though I think the unknown is the most likely). Consequently, I have no idea how my soul will fare in the afterlife when I die. Have I been living my whole life completely wrong? Will I be punished, rewarded, or will my soul just ascend into the cosmos to eternally rest? Should I apologize for my sins? I know I am sorry for them, I am sorry for the sins of humanity as a whole in fact. Though I do often ask myself why I should care about the sundering of humanity, I always realize that no matter what afterlife I find myself in, and even if I find nothing beyond death, my actions as a living being will ultimately accumulate to form the reason for my existence. Many people were meant to be good, many others chose to be so, and many others were destined or chose to be evil, thus we have an ever changing balance of good, evil, chaos and order in the universe, therefore the actions of everyone in this universe will affect the course of the history of the universe. According to  physicists, destiny and fate lead to a chaotic world, as the natural processes of the universe tend to increase the entropy of the system. However, intelligent interactions more often lead to less entropy and thus, less chaos. So, if every sentient species in the universe (providing there are others besides us) contributed to the ordering of everything, there is a possibility of order triumphing over chaos, however the odds are stacked in favor of fate and chaos. Simply put, it is very very hard to try and order the whole universe, including all of the life and substance in it, and why bother when there are possibly an infinite number of realities and universes. Perhaps chaos is nothing to fear, but in fact something to admire. Though a symmetrical shape is balanced and likely more aesthetically appealing, an asymmetrical shape has no restrictions, and therefore has no limits. Society does not need to have order to function properly, but rather good intentions and actions, or so the the anarchists say. I personally think the struggle between chaos and order is not as important as the struggle between good and evil, although I feel this one will never have a resolution. For good to exist, there must be evil. Therefore, the struggle must either go on eternally or the theory of good and evil will simply vanish.  The balance or good and evil, or light and darkness, is ever changing, and rightfully so, as the process is chaotic. The presence or absence of light affects color, and there are many different shades of good and evil accordingly. There is no doubt that I favor good over evil, as I attempt to bring kindness and understanding as apposed to mindless oppression, but I find that quiet often, I succumb to evil and sin, and though I am ashamed of it and want it to stop, I allow it to happen again and again, not because of the reasoning in my mind, but because of the natural tendency for human evil. Compassion, peace, justice, and symmetry are very much artificial. For the most part (with the exception of symmetry, as this is found in nature) none of them would exist if we hadn't thought them up and made them a part of us. Does that mean that they are not worth pursuing? Of course not!!!

Well there, now you see a bit of how my mind works. I did not mean for this blog to be a philosophical ramble, in fact I meant it to be an analysis of my feelings and emotions, my plans, and my worries about my own future, not the future of humanity and the universe. I meant to delve into the concept of love and reasons why I ironically love and hate the emotion. I meant this to be a reflection of myself against the world, not purely an analysis of the world. Well that's what I get for typing this out, and this really is the way I think when I have time to think. I suppose I will save all I mentioned for my second Blog entry... Its freaking 4:36 AM and i need to get some sleep before I sleep the whole day away today
3:42 AM"

The Term "Unnatural" is a Fallacy

The term unnatural is a commonly used compound word that is itself a contradiction and a paradox.  I think it is plainly obvious why: 

(From http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/natural)
"Natural
1. existing in or formed by nature (opposed to artificial): a natural bridge.

2. based on the state of things in nature; constituted by nature: Growth is a natural process.
3. of or pertaining to nature or the universe: natural beauty. ..."

If everything that is existing in, formed by, of and/or pertaining to nature or the universe is natural, and assuming that humans are an ultimate product of nature, then humans are natural. So, Naturally, the behaviors and products of humans, no matter how sporadic, random, detrimental, artificial, or otherwise strange, are natural. Furthermore, everything in, about, and relative to the universe is natural, so everything must be natural, and nothing can be unnatural.  Therefore, nothing can exist that is unnatural, as everything is ultimately part of nature.  Just an observation I've made...

Minecraft as a Purgatory

I've been playing Minecraft for many months now (since October of last year I believe), and since those early days playing survival mode, I've always thought of Minecraft as a sort of digital purgatory:  A place in which one poor soul (your character) spends eternity, isolated from other sentient life and civilization, in an ever expanding and completely wild and dangerous world with no means of escape (even death proves incapable of solving the problem) for a practical eternity.  While this comparison has no practical purpose (as far as I can decide), and Notch may or may not have intended such similarities between the religious concept and his wonderfully addicting game, I still find it and interesting and stimulating topic worthy of mention here.

Purgatory, as described by Wikipedia, "is the condition or process of purification or temporary punishment in which, it is believed, the souls of those who die in a state of grace are made ready for Heaven," (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purgatory).  In my mind, I imagine that the Minecraft survivor is a troubled soul:  One that has seen many horrors in his life, has done some sinful deeds, and is sent to one of the Minecraft worlds as punishment for his crimes or to somehow repair his soul.  Perhaps the world the character is exposed to is meant to mirror parts of the character's soul as sort of a learning tool.  The properties of many creatures in Minecraft may reflect the past life of the survivor in some way: The giant spider, a fearsome and fast creature frenzied by the darkness and docile during the day.  Maybe, in the survivor's past life, he was afraid of spiders.  Or the dark.  Or both.  Perhaps the spider, a real creature on Earth, symbolizes the inherent capacity for both evil and good in natural beings.  Humans, being "natural" entities, no doubt share the same quality as the Minecraft spider, that is, the natural capacity for both good and evil depending on any number of factors. The zombie and skeleton, a corpse and its framework, mindless and violent, perhaps represent the blunt and obvious evil of humanity.  The zombie wears the same clothing as the default survivor, probably signifying some sort of demented alter-ego of the survivor.  The skeleton, ruthless and even unfair due to its ranged bow, might represent the true depth of evil in this person (down to his bones even).  These three creatures, the spider, zombie, and skeleton, cannot truly thrive in sunlight, as if enlightenment and purity are their ultimate bane: Spiders become docile and purely defensive in daylight.  Skeletons and zombies literally burn in the brilliance of the sunlight.  The last "terrestrial" evil, that is to say common in the normal world (I will discuss the Nether in a later post), is the creeper.  This creature does not burn in the sunlight, is almost completely silent, and literally explodes, causing massive damage to the survivor.  This creature would represent the kind of natural violence that cannot be cured by morality and enlightenment, is completely indiscriminate, incurable, and is self-destructive, often fatally: insanity. Even the name, a derivative of the word "creep" suggests an entity with an unhealthy mind.